A Look At Nazareth's Discography

This is going to be a dozy boys and girls. Today we are going to run down and examine the cover art of Nazareth. These legendary hard rockers have released 23 albums and 7 live albums since forming in 1968, and are still rocking it today. Raise your glasses, time for a whole lotta hair of the dog.

Hello 1971, meet Nazareth. In black and white these rockers are...um..ready to rock and most likely roll. Cover one establishes the four members of the band starring off into the distances. Not sure why bands never look straight forward, not cool I guess.Really not much to say here, they're named after Jesus's home town.

A year later and we're on to album too. It's call Exercises, and the cover depicts the proper way to exercise your arm. I know a lot of rock fans are getting a bit pudgy today, looks like Nazareth saw the writing on the wall and tried to encourage their fans to exercise from their early start. If only we would have listened, oh god why the fuck didn't we listen to their warning, my fucking arms would be in great shape right now.

It's their third year, third album, and it's very clear that Nazareth have no idea what the fuck they're doing when it comes to marketing their music with a straightforward album cover and name. This disc is called Razamanaz, what the fuck does that mean? Sounds like a rejected spell name from a fucking Harry Potter book. Than if you're going to have that horrible name, why the fuck would you situate it on the cover so it's hard to read. Lol, and oh ya it's getting hit by lightning cause that's really cool. Yep we'll use Razamanaz in colored block letters and have it getting hit by lightning. Yup, that'll make the kids buy this shit.

So this is Nazareth's second album of 1973 and what the fuck is going on here. Their is a giant fucking Peacock on the cover under the bold album name Loud 'N' Proud. I think they're trying to say they're proud of the way they play loud music, but sitting here in good ole 2011 this is looking pretty fucking gay. And why the fuck is there a fucking Peacock on the cover. Are they know for being fucking loud? I guess they are proud with their fucking bright feathers but the bird never quite caught on as a simple of Hard Rock. At this point we could go fucking anywhere, what are these Scottish bastards going to pull out next? If they were gay, this is the ballsiest way to fucking come out of the closet ever.

So we moved the fucking Peacock out of the way, and it appears that Nazareth have landed in some Latin American country. Also apparently things are getting Rampant. There's a questionable general on the cover, giving me the evil eye, and I have no idea what the fuck we're doing here. Hold on, what the fuck is that thing hovering about the band name, some kind of freaky demon. that must be why things are getting rampant. Otherwise the scenery looks pretty good, nice tropical paradise, I say the band bunkers down here and figures out what the fuck out cover focus is going to be.  

This is Nazareth's most famous album containing their most famous song "Hair of the Dog". Although this album does not align in anyway with the previous albums, this cover is badass. A well drawn, cool depiction of three wholly looking beast dogs on a snowing mountain under some kind of purple wing. I wish all of Narzareth's album covers were this awesome, but sadly that will not be the case.

Looks like Nazareth have gotten pretty famous since their last album. Now they have tons of groupies and fans crowding their limos. I guess it's kinda cool to put a photo like this on an album cover, though a Live album might have been a better place for it. Look at all those silly, silly Nazareth fans smashing their faces against their windows.

 Ok....now we have any angry golden face on the cover of an album named Hot Tracks. Isn't that a pretty shitty name for an album. That's like what people call generic best of albums. Plus why is this head seemingly floating in cyberspace just fucking starring at me? Doesn't make me want to pick up the new Nazareth album, it makes me want to squint back and say "fuck off you golden bastard."

Just so we don't get too confused, it's 1976 now and we're on Nazareth's 8th studio album. Hey look there's the band again only this time in color and staring at you instead of off in the distance. After several fucking nutty album covers, it's really nice to see these guys calming down a little bit; coming back down to earth a bit. The album is called Play N The Game, and lo and behold, the band is actually playing a game of cards. Wow, everything seems to make sense here. Gold star boys, gold star.

After a break, a bear, little card play action, Nazareth return with a badass kill or be killed album cover. This album is so cool and menacing it should be framed and hung in my fucking living room. The dooming title, Expect No Mercy, only adds to its awesomeness and proves Hair of the Dog was not a one hit album wonder for these hard rockers. Lol, the dude with the shield is so gonna die, just look how evil and powerful the other fighter looks.

So the evil fella from the last album apparently did win the fight, and because he showed no mercy and hacked the other fighter into tiny little bits he won the incredible honor of a close up shot for this album cover. Unfortunately he didn't read the fine print in his contract agreement, and instead of being drawn awesome like in the last album, he now looks fucking stupid and almost cartoony. That's what happens when you roll with Nazareth I guess, though we should give the band points for keeping a theme running for two albums, this is their first time accomplishing that.

Well this post is getting kind of long, and after 11 albums we're only through the 70's. Look for Part 2 to crop up in the next couple days, and beleive me Nazareth's albums only getting stranger from here.